theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
