Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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