You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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