i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize