that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.