FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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