So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Your tits are I can't wait for
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
