i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
