I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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