Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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