yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
