About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
that's an acceptable place to lick
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
