When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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