I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You made out with two different species that night
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
