Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
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it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
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He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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