PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I can't put those talents on a resume
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
