Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Randomize
