I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
