I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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