I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
you inspire me to be a worse person
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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