I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
