Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though. http://tfl.nu/ww5c
  Replies (9) Good night (661) Bad night (782) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave. http://tfl.nu/cgpg
  Replies (46) Good night (676) Bad night (9449)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries. http://tfl.nu/qapc
  Replies (26) Good night (4270) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/e3p6
  Replies (36) Good night (878) Bad night (4928) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay http://tfl.nu/yxo6
  Replies (10) Good night (780) Bad night (4610) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius. http://tfl.nu/hqjt
  Replies (26) Good night (7802) Bad night (1057)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place http://tfl.nu/zqzf
  Replies (8) Good night (5905) Bad night (1144) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  drinking out of a sandbucket again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): drinking out of a sandbucket again http://tfl.nu/dvop
  Replies (13) Good night (2979) Bad night (1322) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil http://tfl.nu/8mk8
  Replies (10) Good night (1717) Bad night (1122) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips. http://tfl.nu/z4q3
  Replies (7) Good night (1254) Bad night (984) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success. http://tfl.nu/xbmk
  Replies (12) Good night (4423) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day. http://tfl.nu/oeq7
  Replies (4) Good night (1124) Bad night (346) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself http://tfl.nu/cqdr
  Replies (6) Good night (1690) Bad night (569) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together. http://tfl.nu/yozh
  Replies (6) Good night (968) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.) http://tfl.nu/7rgs
  Replies (3) Good night (770) Bad night (309) Order T-Shirt

Randomize