I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
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