I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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