i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
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