I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
