is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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