summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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