just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
