I must be too annoying 4 u.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
