So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
