He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
True strength comes from lack of pants
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
