dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize