i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
