I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You should frame my arrest warrant.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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