he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
