My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
