I heard we made out
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize