i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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