Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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