with your own penis?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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