we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
