tell your sister to shave her snatch
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize