I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
