my phone cant type all the emotion im having
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize