shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
