I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize