I think I am morally bankrupt
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
