so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
