i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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