Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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